


In Every Reality

by Masrrkan



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Fluff and Angst, He's still serious but not like in a mean kind of way?, Hurt/Comfort, Kanda is a little OOC just because of the setting of this fic, Lavi calls Allen cheeky Nandos because I think it's hilarious, M/M, Rebirth, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-27
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2018-07-27 04:40:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7603768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masrrkan/pseuds/Masrrkan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every life they live, they search for each other. Every life the live, they fall in love again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Silence, Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written anything for these two since I was on ff.net YEARS ago, but with dgm hallow finally out, I decided to go back to my roots.
> 
> This will be a slow burn kind of fic, so I hope you all like it ❤
> 
> This first chapter is very short, I know, but please stick with me! I have a feeling this will be a good fic :)

_ Blurry vision, clouded with blood and left squinting from the assault of rain above him. _

 

_ Lavi couldn't see much. But, what he could see was the outline of a man who he loved dearly leaning in and lifting his sore, broken body into a sitting position.  _

 

_ “Lavi?” His voice was quiet, or maybe Lavi just couldn't hear anymore. The blood rushing in his ears, the sound of shrieking and yelling in the background.  _

 

_ “Yuu,” Lavi rasped out, and he was surprised by how pathetic he sounded. “I'll see you later, okay?”  _

 

_ “Don't say that.” Kanda sounded like he was crying. He's never seen Kanda cry, and even though he was sitting right in front of him, his eye couldn't even catch a glimpse of it. “You're not going anywhere.”  _

 

_ Lavi felt himself open his mouth, felt his lips moving, but no sound came out. _

 

_ “Lavi?” _

 

_ Silence. _

 

_ “Lavi…?” _

  
_ Darkness. _


	2. Familiar Faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok I know this chapter is sorta lackluster during the dinner scene, but that's because I want to bring up Kanda and Emilia more with just Lavi around. 
> 
> Otherwise, I hope you enjoy this! I know it took me forever to get this out, and I apologize ;;

Lavi slung himself over the back of the couch, watching his close friend, Allen, as he typed away at his phone. “Is that your g _ iiiii _ rlfriend?” He teased, poking the boy's shoulder. “You should just ask her out already, Al.”

 

Allen, pouting and puffing his cheeks out, turned to glare at his redheaded friend. “I can't yet, Lenalee still sees me as like, a brother.” He said with a sigh. “Besides, I'm content just being friends.”

 

“Nope. You're definitely not happy with just being friends, and we all know it.” Lavi continued poking Allen's shoulder, not like it bothered the boy at this point, since he'd long since gotten used to it. “You look at her all the time, you always talk about her, you're always hanging out with her. I'm pretty sure she's the only one in our whole friend group that doesn't notice you're in love with her, honestly.” 

 

“Well, it doesn't matter anyway, because I won't push her if she isn't interested.” Allen shrugged. “I like things like this to be mutual, Lavi.”

 

Lavi slowly fell forward and rolled into the couch, grinning stupidly. “Maybe I'll swoop in and steal her away.” He joked.

 

“That isn't funny.” Allen frowned. “Now you're just being mean.”

 

“Sorry, sorry. It was only a joke, man.” The redhead tipped his head back and glanced at the TV, seeing a boring game of soccer on the screen. “Why do you even like soccer? It's just running with balls. I do that every day.”

 

“First of all: it's football, and second: ew?” Allen laughed. “American's don't appreciate football as much as Europeans do. It's like how I don't get why you guys are so into your version of football.” He shrugged again, setting his phone down to watch the screen.

 

“Weirdo.” Lavi giggled as he stood back up, walking to the kitchen. “You want something to eat? Actually, what am I saying? Of course you do.” 

  
  


***

 

“Do you, like, believe in soulmates?” Lavi asked, laying in bed with Allen tapping away on his phone while sitting in the floor. “I always thought the idea was cool, but do you think it's real?”

 

“Who knows. I don't really think about that stuff much.” Allen told him. “Are you talking about that dream you have every so often? With the girl who has the really long hair?” 

 

“Yeah,” Lavi nodded. “I wonder if she's real. I'd love to meet her someday, and find out if she has dreams of me too.” 

 

“Okay, sappy, go to bed. Cross is coming to get me in a few.” Allen stood, pulling the blankets up to cover his friend. 

 

“Okay, mom. Tell me a bedtime story?” Lavi asked with a laugh, cuddling up under his blankets. “Pretty please?”

 

Allen rolled his eyes heavenward, sighing as he sat at the edge of the bed. “There once was a boy named Lavi, who was so ugly that everyone died. The end.”

 

“That wasn't a good story.”

 

“Shut up and go to sleep.” Allen pinched Lavi’s nose and laughed before standing. “I'll see you later, man.”

 

“Tell Cross I said he can go fuck himself.” Lavi grinned. “And that I'm stealing you away once I find an apartment to move into.”

 

“Ha ha. You say that as if he'd even  _ let _ me move out.” Allen grabbed his backpack he had discarded on the side of the room, shrugging it on his shoulders and waving. “He's probably here by now, so I'll see you later.”

 

“Night, Al.” Lavi raised both arms up and waved them almost violently, until his bedroom door shut.

 

He then rolled over, face in his pillow, and very quickly fell asleep. He dreamed of that woman again.  _ Yuu. _ A Japanese name, and a beautiful one at that.

 

***

 

It happened so fast, Lavi couldn't even register it until hours later, when he was home.

 

He'd seen her,  _ the _ woman from his dream. Long black hair, deep blue eyes, a gorgeous figure. At campus. At  _ his  _ college.  _ What was she doing there?? _

 

Lavi panicked, immediately texted Allen about it, and then stared at his ceiling in disbelief. There was no way.  _ No  _ way she was  _ really  _ real. Actually, now that Lavi was thinking a little more about her, she looked a little bit… masculine. Still thin, lithe, with a sharp jaw and full lips, much like a lady. However she seemed to have hardened eyes, larger hands, and a good tone of muscle to her arms. 

 

He screamed quietly to himself, his single green eye wide with panic. He had been so close to her, but why didn't he say anything? She was beautiful, and he wanted to hear her voice more than anything in the world. Even if she turned out to be a he, Lavi didn't care. He swung both ways, after all, so it wouldn't be too much trouble.

 

His phone vibrated and shook him from his thoughts, so Lavi quickly picked it up and unlocked his phone to see the message from Allen.

 

_ From: Cheeky Nandos (Allen)  _

_ “Are you sure it wasn't someone who just happened to look suspiciously similar to your dream lady?”  _

 

_ To: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “No man I'm 100% positive it was her. Except I think she may be a dude. I'm not actually sure yet.” _

 

_ From: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “You're losing your mind I think” _

_ “Don't get too excited over this tho. I'm no expert, but I'm positive people in your imagination aren't real” _

 

_ To: Cheeky Nandos (Allen)  _

_ “I know but dude, I just hope I see them again. I need to know for sure” _

 

The conversation ended quickly, after that. Allen very quickly changed the topic to one involving his totally romantic date with Lenalee, where he took her to a movie and to a Chinese buffet (which Allen claimed the girl loved, since Lenalee will never eat Chinese buffet food  _ ever _ ), and yet he still pushed that it was strictly platonic.  _ What a dink, _ Lavi thought to himself while reading the obnoxiously long texts.

 

_ To: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “Do you think dream person likes buffet food?” _

 

_ From: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “I'd imagine that your dream girl would like anything your mind conjured up, since she isn't real” _

 

Lavi pouted, eye narrowing a bit. 

 

_ To: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “She is real, dude. I swear, tomorrow I'm gonna find her and talk to her and show you that she exists” _

 

_ From: Cheeky Nandos (Allen) _

_ “If you say so. I have homework I need to do, so go jerk it to some imaginary tits or something” _

 

Then, Lavi was again left alone to his thoughts. Not like it lasted too long, though, since his door swung open and his grandfather stood, miniscule, at his doorway. “Jesus Lord, panda, you could knock!” The boy groaned.

 

“Lavi, do the dishes so I can make dinner.” He said, simply, before he exited with the door left wide open in his wake.

 

_ I can't wait to move out. _ Lavi thought to himself with a grimace as he stood up, fixing his shirt while making his way to the kitchen. The dishes were stacked high, and he pondered for a few minutes about why he deliberately tortures himself.  _ Fuck you, past me _ , rang through his mind when he poured the dish soap over everything in the sink.

 

It maybe took Lavi an hour to finish cleaning it all up. Bookman obviously wasn't too happy with how long it took, but then again, the old man was never pleased with anything he did. Just something Lavi had grown accustomed to over the years.

 

“We have guests coming over tonight.” His grandfather spoke, taking the pans he needed and setting them on the stove. “So put on something nicer.”

 

Lavi nodded, setting the last dish onto the drying rack. “Who's coming?” He asked, turning to lean against the sink. “Is it that weird artist guy you met in your yoga class?”

 

“Yes, it's Froi.” His grandfather nodded, chopping up some vegetables and tossing them into a steamer. “He's visiting with his kids, since his son recently moved back into town. I told him they could all come by for dinner.” And, by kids, Lavi already knew he meant  _ adopted _ children. Froi Tiedoll had quite the knack for adopting anything that breathed.

 

“So, like, how many people are we talking here?” Lavi pushed off the counter and started pulling out the clean, fancy dishes they only use probably once a year. “Like, extra chairs and those dinner table expanding pieces lots of people? Or is it more of just two extra chairs?” He asked.

 

“The first.” Bookman answered, starting to cut the beef up. “Go change first, then worry about setting the table.” He shooed Lavi away with a deep frown before going back to his dinner preparations.

 

The redhead groaned, turning back to his bedroom and tossing on his nice sweater vest (in his favorite shade of olive green, which was totally _ not _ ugly) and a pair of khakis. Yep, he looked  _ fancy.  _ Especially since his sweater vest had little argyle designs around the waist. What wasn't fancy about argyles?  _ Nothing. _

 

He walked out again and very quickly made the table, before stopping and looking up at the door when he heard the doorbell. “I got it, Gramps.” Lavi called. He adjusted his eye patch on his way to the door, looking in his phone camera to make sure it wasn't askew and letting g the scar peek out. Messing with hair once, he shoved his phone in his pocket and opened the door with a smile. “Hello-” 

 

“ _ Dude _ , I had no idea a pirate lived here.” A boy with messy brown hair and purple marks ( _ tattoos?  _ Lavi had no idea.) under his eyes said as he walked inside, taking off his shoes. 

 

“Daisya, don't be so rude!” Froi said, following behind with a slight huff. “Evening, Lavi.” He nodded toward him before removing his shoes. “It smells divine in here! Don't mind if I make my way to the kitchen, son.” He said with a chuckle before walking off.

 

“So, like… not a pirate?” The boy, Daisya, asked as he took off his hoodie. “Bummer.”

 

“I mean, I'd assume I'd be one if I lived on a boat and stole from people.” Lavi said with a shrug, opening his mouth to say something else when he noticed someone else walking inside.

 

A person, or rather  _ the person _ that Lavi had seen earlier. Now, up close, it was easy to see he was, indeed, a man. His long, black hair was up in a ponytail, his bangs messy from the wind outside. He glanced at Lavi with his stony, blue eyes before he removed his jacket. 

 

“Ah, hello! I'm Lavi. I don't think I met you before.” He said, grinning widely, almost childishly, and holding a hand out. Daisya looked somewhat offended, since he didn't get a greeting like that. 

 

“Kanda.” The man said, and his voice was like silk. “Where'd that old man go, Daisya? He left Mari outside by himself.” He frowned, shoes being removed and placed daintily beside the door before he stepped passed Lavi, refusing to acknowledge his attempted handshake.

 

Lavi turned, then glanced outside to see a blonde girl in a pretty white blouse and a high waisted brown skirt helping another man up to the porch. “Does he need any help?” He asked, stepping aside as the two walked inside.

 

“Oh, no, I'm fine.” The man said, turning to face Lavi. “I think Froi just took my cane with him when he came inside, but thank you for offering.” He turned when the woman patted his shoulder before walking towards the dining area. “My name is Marie.”

 

_ A girl's name?  _ Lavi raised an eyebrow and nodded. “Lavi. It's nice to meet you.” He said with a smile, shutting the door finally. “Should I go get your cane, or…?”

 

Kanda came back in with a frown, taking Marie's hand and setting his cane in his palm. “Here, now let's go to the table. Tiedoll said the food is almost done.” The two were then walking off and seating themselves at the dining table, with Daisya following - and complaining - right behind them.

 

Lavi swore he never felt more ignored before in his own home.

 

***

 

As it turned out, Kanda had a first name. Yuu, just like the girl in Lavi’s dreams. Only his Yuu was his lover, from what he could assume, and this Yuu… had a girlfriend, the blonde woman sitting beside him named Emilia Galmar.

 

Needless to say, Lavi felt only slightly betrayed. He didn't let it bother him, since he got to listen to Kanda’s beautiful, silky voice shit talk Daisya the entire meal. Yeah. That was heaven, alright. That is, until Daisya began to argue back, only for both to be hushed by Froi for being noisy and rude at the dinner table.

 

“So, Yuu, Bookman tells me that Lavi attends the same college you transferred into.” Froi started, after a very long and silent lapse in the conversation. “You should ask him to show you around campus.”

 

Lavi felt a bit surprised that he was finally being brought up in conversation. “Oh, it isn't that big. I don't think he'll have any problems finding his way around.” He spoke up, smiling awkwardly.

 

“He's right. And,  someone already showed me and Emilia around.” Kanda spoke, coldly, but was met with a gentle slap to his arm after sticking a forkful of vegetables in his mouth.

 

“That person didn't do anything but talk to his friends. I'm sure Lavi would be a better tour guide.” Emilia said with a smile when she turned to him. “Do you have classes tomorrow, too?” A nod from the redhead, and she was clapping her hands together with a hum. “Perfect. Will you meet up with us in the courtyard tomorrow at, say… uh, I think our earliest class is at ten in the morning?”

 

“So, how about I get there closer to eight?” Lavi suggested, and he didn't fail to see the way Kanda grimaced.  _ He probably isn't a morning person. _ “My first class isn't until ten, also, but I can get there earlier to tour you around.”

 

“Sounds perfect! Thank you for this, Lavi.” Emilia smiled, and Lavi could totally see how she managed to nab a guy as grumpy and uptight as Kanda.

  
  


***

 

That night, after everyone had left, Lavi sat on the couch, texting Allen about what had happened that night. He was met with some disbelief, but Allen agreed to meet up and help tour Kanda and Emilia around campus. 

 

Bookman sat down beside Lavi to turn on his nightly chick flick movies. He sipped at his tea while Lavi tapped away at his phone, but they could feel some sort of tension in the air between them.

 

Finally, Bookman spoke up. “You used to have dreams of a person who looked exactly like that Kanda Yuu.” He stated. “He's a spitting image. Even the names are the same.”

 

“I can't believe you remember that.” Lavi groaned, tossing his phone onto the coffee table. “I still have them, actually, but I'm not sure why.”

 

“Who knows.” His grandfather shrugged. “It could be a premonition. Maybe a memory from another life. Or-”

 

“Not again with your weird reincarnation stuff, panda.” The redhead groaned again, louder and more exasperated, before grabbing his phone and standing. “Maybe it's just super coincidental.” Bookman gave him a look that Lavi knew meant  _ “you're in denial, moron”. _ Lavi decided he didn't want to hear any sort of argument about it, and quickly retreated back to his bedroom. 

 

Undressing and falling into bed, Lavi wanted to sleep away his weird day. Forget about how his lifelong dream soulmate was a real person who was a complete asshole, and in a relationship. Thankful as he was to finally see Kanda Yuu in the flesh, he regretted it all the same.

  
Sleep came easy, but the dreams were always the same. He had those horrifically real  _ memories _ of dying in Yuu's arms, of everything going dark, before starting awake with a gasp. His alarm was going off, and it was six in the morning.


	3. Ghost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took me literally forever to update. Like, almost an entire year

Lavi was a good half hour early to his meet up with Kanda and Emilia. The morning air was cold, his stomach was empty and rumbling, and Allen was grumpily sitting beside him eating his third breakfast sandwich, refusing to share ( _ “this is punishment for making me wake up early just to see your crush” _ was what Allen said.)

 

But, he perked up when he heard the voice of the girl. Lavi waved to Emilia, looking past her to see Kanda following behind with a coffee in his hands and his eyes half shut.  _ Definitely not a morning person. _

 

“Thanks again for this, Lavi.” Emilia said, and the redhead was suddenly aware he tuned her out so he could gawk at the other man. “Hello, I'm Emilia Galmar.” She said, turning to Allen.

 

“Allen Walker.” The boy smiled, holding a hand out to shake hers. “Pleased to meet you, Emilia, and you too, um-” Allen trailed off, looking at Kanda. “Your name…?”

 

“Kanda Yuu.” Emilia answered for him, since the incredibly tired man seemed to have no intention of answering. “He's a grumpy waker, so don't mind him. I doubt he'll want to do any sort of social interaction before ten in the morning.” she giggled.

 

“That's fine, I'm not much of a morning person, either.” Allen laughed, then nodded to Kanda. “But it's nice to meet you, as well.”

 

Lavi swore that Kanda's glare to Allen would kill most weak-willed men. His frown was deep, and his eyes were dark and narrowed into some intense irritation.  _ Did he hate Allen, or something? Have they been met before? _ He wasn't sure if Allen noticed it, so he decided it would be best to leave it be.

 

“Well! Let's get on with the tour, then.” Lavi grinned and shrugged his jacket on before heading towards the building closest to them. “This is the general studies building. Your core subjects will be here, like math or English.” He said, once they stepped inside. “I take Allen and I are both in this building at the beginning of the day, so if you need to ask one of us a question we'll usually be in Mr. Arystar’s classroom, at the end of this hall.”

 

Emilia nodded, taking in the information while glancing around. “That's good to know. I'm sure we'll have a few questions every now and then, so thank you.” She smiled.

 

“Okay, next building!” Lavi grinned as he turned back out the doors. “I'd show you each of the class rooms, but I'm sure you'll find them easily when you see who your teacher is and what building they'll be in.” 

 

“Most of the classes are organized into the buildings by what they teach.” Allen said. “Like, this one right up here, is the art courses. That includes things like woodworking, metal shop, anything else that's art based like painting or animation.” 

 

Emilia had pulled out her schedule as soon as they stepped into the art building, and began writing on it. “Are the theater classes in here, too?” She asked, placing her papers to the wall as she jotted little notes down.

 

“Yup. They're on the bottom floor, though.” Lavi answered. “This building is pretty big, in comparison to the others. The science building is the largest, though.”

 

After leaving the art building, Lavi and Allen lead the two around to the other buildings on campus. The tour extended to to the dormitories, health and fitness center, cafés, and so on.

 

By the time they had finished, it was nearing the time for them all to be heading to their first classes of the day. 

 

“Thank you so much for the tour, Lavi.” Emilia said with a grin. “I'll be heading to the science rooms first, so I'm really happy you told me which floor my class was on.” 

 

The redhead nodded, smiling back at the girl, before he turned to look at Kanda. “Where's your first class?” 

 

The previously tired man was now more conscious, and he irritably frowned in Lavi’s direction. “Japanese culture.” He answered. 

 

_ Boy, not too friendly even when awake, huh?  _ Lavi chuckled and nodded. “Well, you guys have fun. Like I said, if there's any questions you have at all, me and Al will be over here.”

 

With that, they parted ways. 

 

Allen frowned a bit as he walked with Lavi to the general studies building, opening his phone. “I thought I recognized him.” He mumbled.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Kanda.” Allen said, holding his phone up to Lavi. On the screen, was a picture of beautiful Lenalee sitting beside her older brother, Komui, and behind them, was Kanda.

 

“Whoa, she knows him?” Lavi snatched the phone out of Allen's hand, zooming in on the picture. “Wait, how? I thought my gramps said that Kanda just got home from wherever.”

 

“Lenalee sent me this a few days ago. It was before you told me you saw him around campus.” Allen took his phone back, but not without some struggle. “I saved it because, well, it's Lenalee. I'm glad I did, though. Now that means you can ask her about him, right?”

 

“Yes!” Lavi grinned. “After school today, we're meeting up with Lenalee so I can interrogate her.” They stopped at the door of their classroom, quickly silencing their phones before stepping inside.

 

*

*

*

 

The last of Lavi and Allen's classes ended later in the afternoon. Allen had gotten out at a little after 4pm, and Lavi had gotten out at 5pm. They had the rest of the evening to do anything, but, they chose to spend that time hunting down Lenalee.

 

Allen had claimed that Lenalee should have been in the culinary classroom, since she spent the majority of her time after class tutoring other students. But, alas, she was nowhere to be seen.

 

“Can't you just call her, Allen?” Lavi asked, nudging his pale haired companion. “I'm getting tired of running around campus. It's getting late, too.”

 

Allen rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone to open up his contacts. “I didn't want to call in case she  _ was  _ tutoring.” He explained as he placed the phone to his ear. A few rings in, and finally he was met with a sweet little hello.

 

“Lenalee, where are you right now?” Allen asked.

 

_ “I'm at a café with some friends.”  _ She said.  _ “Why'd you ask?” _

 

“Lavi and I wanted to meet up and ask you about some things.” 

 

_ “Oh! What sorta things? Maybe you can just meet up with us, then.” _ Lenalee’s voice was light and airy, and Allen smiled fondly when she giggled.

 

“That's sounds good to me. Which café are you at?” Allen smacked Lavi’s arm when the redhead began making kissy noises in his direction, then started pulling him towards the courtyard. 

 

_ “Right now I'm at Ark. It's that one right down the street from campus, with the weird guy who likes to smoke cigarettes outside everyday.”  _

 

“Oh yeah, that one. The guy I played cards with that one time.” Allen nodded. “Lavi and I will head over there now. Just sit down somewhere and we'll find you.”

 

The goodbye was quick, but before Lavi had any chance to ask about  _ which  _ person Allen had played cards with, and  _ how _ that ended up, the shorter of the two was tugging Lavi to his car.

 

“I hope you don't make any inappropriate jokes in front of Lenalee.” Allen pointed. “Especially about how you think we should date.”

 

“That doesn't mean I can't  _ suggest  _ it.” Lavi grinned, shrugging before he took his seat and pulled on his seatbelt. “You're made for each other. Stop pretending you and Lena aren't soulmates.”

 

“Lavi, be quiet.” Allen huffed as he started his car. Before pulling out, though, the boy grabbed a box of cigarettes from his glove compartment and lit one up, taking a long drag.

 

His friend, however, stared. Awestruck. Lavi had  _ never _ seen Allen smoke  _ anything  _ before. Not even when Lavi was experimenting with cannabis back in his freshman year of college, trying to get Allen to smoke it with him.

 

“What is that?” Lavi asked. “And, better question,  _ why?” _

 

Allen narrowed his eyes, before blinking slowly. “I can't handle Cross. He stresses me out, he's a shitty person  _ and _ a shitty father figure, and I need some stress relief.” He flicked the ash out the window of his car and began to drive, occasionally placing the cigarette between his lips.

 

“I mean. I don't  _ blame  _ you, but holy shit. Why not just try drinking, instead?” Lavi pressed, trying to find the  _ real  _ root of Allen's problem. He knew his longtime friend better than that.

 

Cross was most certainly  _ not  _ the issue that made him start smoking.

 

But, Allen had a purely iron defense. He'd never crack, ever. Not for any reason. “I won't be like Cross, Lavi. I'll stop smoking once I'm able to move out of my place.” And that was it. 

 

When Allen wanted a conversation finished, Lavi never pressed. But, Lavi  _ did  _ wish that Allen trusted him enough to talk about his darkest demons.

 

For a long time, Lavi and Allen have been the closest of friends. They shared everything, they  _ knew _ everything about each other. 

 

Except, Lavi knew that Allen had his secrets. He knew that, as much as they knew each other, he'd never know Allen that well. There were parts of Allen that no one will know about, ever, and Lavi has accepted that fact. He's just happy that Allen was his friend at all.

 

The rest of the car ride was quiet, but it was fine since it only took about five minutes to reach the café. Lenalee was sitting outside at one of the bistro tables, sipping at her cup of coffee while glancing at her phone.

 

Allen and Lavi pulled up, parking, and getting out of the car once Allen put out his cigarette. “Hi, Lenalee.” The shorter of the two said, waving and smiling as he sat himself down beside her. “I thought you said you were with some friends?”

 

“I am! They're just inside, waiting for their things to finish.” Lenalee shrugged, smiling sweetly back at Allen and bringing a hand up to play with her long, dark hair. “So, what did you have to ask me?”

 

“Well,” Allen started, “it was more a question that Lavi had, not so much me.” He shrugged.

 

“I need to know how you and Kanda know each other.” Lavi slapped his hands onto the table as he sat down, looking Lenalee right in her eyes and frowning a bit.

 

“Kanda?” Lenalee tilted her head and smiled. “He's an old friend of mine. I met him in grade school.” She explained. “He's like, my best friend ever. He's actually inside, that's who I came here with. Him and his girlfriend.”

 

Lavi's jaw dropped a bit, and he groaned loudly. “Lenalee, how have you  _ never  _ mentioned him before? He's my-” before the redhead could finish, Allen kicked his shin, right before the door opened and the man in question came walking out.

 

“Oh! Allen and Lavi!” Emilia smiled sweetly, seating herself at the table. “How coincidental! I wasn't expecting to see you here.” 

 

Kanda made a grunt of acknowledgement at the two as he sat down, right between Lavi and Emilia. Lavi was now incredibly hyperaware of the nice, floral smell that came off the long haired man, and it distracted him from whatever the other three were saying.

 

“Right, Lavi?” Allen nudged his friend, startling him a bit.

 

“Huh?” Lavi stared, stupidly, at Allen. “What? I zoned out, sorry.”

 

He didn't miss the roll of Allen's eyes, though, before the boy spoke. “We came by to meet with Lenalee, because I mentioned that Kanda was in the picture she sent me the other day, and we were curious how they know each other.”

 

“Oh, yeah.” Lavi was at least happy that that was true, even if it was leaving out a  _ few  _ small details. “I thought it was weird that my Gramp's friend's son was friends with Lenalee, and I'd never once heard her talk about him.”

 

“There's not much to talk about.” Kanda shrugged. “I moved away after high school, so we haven't seen each other in a while.”

 

Lenalee nodded. “He moved to Japan to study Japanese art and stuff like that.” She continued. “We didn't get to talk much while he was away, because of time zones and all. He texted me pictures of the scenery every so often, but that was about it.”

 

“Whoa, that's cool.” Lavi said. “So, how'd you and Emilia meet?” He asked, looking between them. 

 

“Well, we actually met at the airport going from America to Europe.” Emilia started, and got a nod from Kanda. “Well, it was more me going to France and him going to Japan. I'm studying child care and pediatrics, and I got offered to go to school in Paris and work with children.” 

 

“So, did one of you get on the wrong flight?” Allen asked. “I figured flights to Japan and Europe would go in different directions.” 

 

“Oh, no.” Emilia shook her head. “We sat next to each other on the plane, and we were flying together until his last flight to Japan.” She said. “We started talking because I saw him sketching and drawing on the plane, and it just sorta clicked from there on.” 

 

Emilia let out a dreamy sigh, and smiled at Kanda. The man, in turn, gave her a small, yet genuine, smile.

 

“I thought she was a little annoying at first.” Kanda said. “But, she grew on me pretty fast.” Lavi swore that was the most he'd heard the man talk, and he was positively smitten with his voice.

 

“But, after I got off my flight, I gave him my number and we started texting pretty frequently. Then we started calling each other every night, then during summer when we had breaks from school one of us would fly over to see the other.” Emilia continued, still smiling happily at the fond memories. “I've visited Japan more than he's visited France, though. I just had more money at the time, since my dad's work pays a lot and he always transferred me money every other week.”

 

“It's so romantic, isn't it?” Lenalee asked, turning to look at Lavi and Allen. “Talk about soulmates, huh? Some people are so lucky.”

 

“Yeah.” Lavi nodded, but spoke pretty softly. “Y'know, I wonder when I'll meet my soulmate.” 

 

Allen glanced at Lavi, raising an eyebrow at him. “You're probably a lot closer than you think. This is a small town, after all.” He nudged Lavi's leg with his own from under the table, chuckling at him.

 

“Yeah! I didn't really believe in soulmates until I met Yuu.” Emilia hummed.

 

“Yuu? Isn't that your last name?” Allen asked. “Like, Kanda Yuu.”

 

“It's backwards in Japan, Al.” Lavi chuckled. “Even I know that.”

 

“So, why did Emilia introduce him with his last name first?” Allen questioned, clear confusion all over his face.

 

“Habit.” Kanda answered. 

 

“He got used to saying his name that way when in Japan. Even I'll introduce him that way, just because I'm more used to hearing his name said in that order.” Emilia added.

 

“Ah, okay.” Allen nodded. “So, what's Japan like? Is it nice?”

 

“Oh, it's gorgeous.” Emilia said, excitedly, and Kanda nodded a bit as she continued to speak. “There so much beautiful scenery, the architecture is amazing, and the cherry blossoms when in full bloom are breathtaking.”

 

“I'd love to go sometime.” Lenalee spoke up, clapping her hands together. “Next time you guys go back to visit, you should take me with you!”

 

“Sure, I have no problems with that.” Kanda shrugged. “I need to head home, though. Froi asked me to help Daisya with some project for his art class.” With a sigh, he stood. “Froi’s the damn artist. I don't know why he doesn't just help him.” 

 

“Well, Froi has a lot of stuff he has to do everyday, so he probably just asked because he doesn't have the time.” Emilia stood as well, kissing Kanda's cheek. “I'll be heading back home too, but I'll text you when I get there.”

 

Kanda nodded and hummed when he felt soft lips on his cheek, a light chuckle leaving him. “Sounds good. I'll see you later, too, Lenalee.” The man waved, and with that, he was leaving.

 

Emilia turned to the three still sitting, and waved. “My dad and I have plans for tonight, so I gotta head home.” She said. “It was really nice getting to see you two again, and thanks a lot for the tour of campus.” She pushed her blonde hair back behind her ear before bending down to grab her coffee. “I'll see you all again tomorrow, I hope!”

 

The girl trotted off after that, and soon the three friends were alone at the table once again.

 

“She seems like a really nice person.” Lavi said. “I like her.” The redhead felt like he was betraying himself a bit by saying that. Kanda Yuu was meant to be with  _ him _ , right?

 

… right?

 

“So, does that mean you know Kanda?” Lenalee asked, interrupting Lavi's internal conflict. “Or did you just meet him through your grandfather?”

 

“Oh. Just through gramps, I guess? He invited his friend over and he just brought all of his kids.” Lavi answered, trying his best to shake the thoughts of Kanda from his mind. “Meeting him was just really coincidental. Then Allen showed me that picture, then we can here, and, yeah. Not much else really to explain I think.” 

 

Lenalee nodded, sipping her coffee and standing. “Well, at least now he's got more friends to talk to. Kanda is sort of a loner, so just be patient with him. He's a brat sometimes but when he opens up, he's a very nice person.” She said. “I have homework to do, so I'm heading back home. Allen, do you want to go get some food and a movie this weekend?” She asked, bringing a hand up to play with her hair.

 

Allen blushed, smiling and nodding. “Sure! We can go see Wonder Woman, if you want!” He suggested. “I know you were talking about wanting to see it. Maybe we can go to that one buffet you liked and then head out to the movie?”

 

“Sounds good!” Lenalee nodded. “Hey, I'll text you about it later, okay? Nice seeing you two, bye-bye!” The girl quickly bounded off in high spirits, humming as she did.

 

Allen turned to Lavi, his face beet red and his hands on his cheeks. “My God, she's so cute.” He whispered. “Come on, you're going home. I need to find out what to wear for this weekend.” 

 

“But, it's only Monday?” Lavi raised an eyebrow and chuckled. “Eh, whatever. No use talking sense into you.” Lavi made his way back to the car, hopping inside. “I'm glad I know more about Kanda, though. But… Al, would I be a bad person if I tried to sabotage a relationship?”

 

“I'd say you'd be a terrible person.” Allen replied once he got into the car. “But, will that stop you? Probably not. Just try to avoid doing that.” Once the car was started, they were back on the street.

 

“I'm just saying.” Lavi crossed his arms. “Soulmates gotta be together. Maybe even Kanda already knows it too.” He smiled. “I'm tellin’ ya, Allen. Soulmates. Emilia is nice and sweet and perfect, but there's no way they'll last forever.”

 

“I think maybe you're just a little too obsessed with this.” Allen glanced over at Lavi with a frown. “You should leave them be. It's obvious and they're close and they're in love, so why would you try to ruin that? Because you have a dream about a person who looks like Kanda and has the same name?” The white haired boy turned once they stopped at a red light, frowning still. “You need to stop being delusional. There's a chance he'll never think of you romantically, let alone love you.”

 

That shook something in Lavi. Never being loved by his soulmate? Would that be possible? Better yet, was Allen right…? It could just be an incredibly coincidental dream. Kanda probably didn't even do relationships before Emilia happened. He seemed like the type who never considered dating.

 

“Yeah.” Lavi said, finally. He sunk back into the seat, sighing softly and with some defeat. “You're probably right. No, I bet you  _ are  _ right. What's my deal? Why can't I let this go?” He groaned.

 

“I dunno, man. But, you need to relax a bit. Just try to stop thinking so much about Kanda and maybe you'll get over it soon.” Allen reached over to pay Lavi's shoulder before the light turned green.

  
The rest of the ride was quiet. It was unpleasant, because it left Lavi alone to his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can find me on Tumblr at tigatrons.tumblr.com (my main blog) or at souais.tumblr.com (my writing blog)


	4. Mr. Brightside

Kanda stared at the ceiling in disbelief. He’d woken up twice in one night, not even two hours apart. At 4am, some dots finally started connecting in his mind. Lavi, a familiar name, a familiar face, voice, eye. The scar under his eyepatch was in a cross shape. He lost it in an accident as a child. His hair was silky and always smelled like citrus.

 

Kanda felt emotions welling up in his chest.  _ Why? Why now? Why here?  _ He didn’t understand. Years of dreaming of this man, only to meet him now? When he was happy with someone else?  _ Why?  _

 

The dreams were constant. Every day, when he fell asleep, he watched Lavi die in his arms. The rain poured down on his paling face, his eyepatch hanging off and torn from one of many cuts sustained in whatever battle was being fought around them. His jacket, black and red and adorned with shiny accessories, and Kanda remembered the color of his scarf. Orange, Lavi’s favorite color. The one Kanda had bought for him. How did he remember all this? Why did he remember? When did he make these memories?

 

It tugged at his heart, until a small tear rolled down his cheek. Why did he have to lose Lavi? What happened to him? Why couldn’t he  _ save  _ Lavi??

 

Why couldn’t it have been him instead?

 

*

*

*

*

 

Lavi struggled briefly with getting out of bed for school. The end of the week came fast, faster than he wanted. Friday morning classes were always the worst, and even  _ more  _ worse than that was getting to see Kanda in his class across the hall at the end of the day. They made a habit of walking to and from the class they had in the same building, but Lavi always felt like he was being judged. The sight of Kanda made his heart flutter, every hum and word he spoke was music to him.

 

A more beautiful person couldn’t exist in the world; Lavi was convinced. 

 

It broke his heart a little bit every time he watched him leave with Emilia, without so much as a goodbye to Lavi.

 

*   
*   
*

*

 

“Lavi,” Kanda spoke, standing beside the redhead who sat on the edge of the fountain in the center of the college courtyard, “I need to talk to you about something.” Despite the way he tried softening his voice, he still came out gruff and irritated. Which only made him scowl. And, oh shit, Lavi looked like he wanted to run for the hills and never come back.

 

“Uh, sure, what’s up?” Lavi said as he stood, gently kicking a pebble while shoving his hands into his comfy, oversized green hoodie. “Class is over, so I’m just waiting for Allen to get back. You wanna grab a coffee at Ark?” 

 

“No, no coffee. I don’t really want to talk about this with a lot of people around.” Kanda spoke, shifting from one foot to the other. Suddenly, he was incredibly aware of how the bottom of his jeans didn’t fully cover his ankles. His shoes, only a pair of blue converse, did little to cover up the skin that was now growing cold from the autumn air. Why was he so nervous? Why focus on something he never bothered to notice before? What was the point?  _ Just stop thinking and tell him!!!  _

 

“Oh, well, we can just sit here and talk then.” Lavi said with a nod, and Kanda didn’t miss the way the man fiddled with the end of his orange scarf. Kanda also couldn’t help but think of how that same scarf, in his dreams, was drenched in blood. “What’s up, though? You seem, like… weirdly serious. More than usual, at least.” 

 

Kanda sat once Lavi did, his knees feeling stiff and cold. Pins and needles immediately filled up his feet and calves, and then the man realized that now he can’t back out. “It’s… about a dream I’ve been having lately. Well, more like I’ve always been having the same dream, but I noticed now that you were the one in it.” He said, blurting it all out before he had the chance to stop himself.

 

Lavi looked stunned, to say the least. Like he wasn’t expecting to hear something so ridiculous come out of Kanda’s mouth. Kanda. The most serious and emotionally constipated man in the world, was talking about dreams he had to  _ Lavi.  _ Another wildly constipated man, but constipated in a different way. Yeah. Lavi was definitely not someone to talk to about this.

 

Except, Lavi narrowed his eyes and something clicked in his mind. “Allen told you, didn’t he?”

 

“What?” Kanda asked, confusion replacing the once serious expression he wore.

 

“The dream I have. I only ever told Allen and my gramps about it. God, this is so embarrassing.” Lavi ran a hand over his neck, groaning a bit as he turned to face away from Kanda, instead looking at his shoes. “Look, I know it’s weird that I have dreams about you, but you don’t need to get my hopes up for some joke Allen wants to play on me, okay? He knows those dreams are a sensitive topic for me.” He frowned. “I don’t tell just anyone about them.”

 

Kanda took a little taken aback by Lavi’s sudden burst of annoyance, but even still, he found himself unable to fully wrap his head around it all. “No, I’m being serious. I don’t even like that beansprout, so he didn’t say anything about any of that to me.” He quickly spoke, cheeks flushing uncharacteristically. “You… have dreams about me?”

 

Then, it was Lavi’s turn to blush. He was being serious? This wasn’t just some prank Allen tried pulling by outing Lavi’s dreams to Kanda? “Wait. Hold the phone.” The redhead held his hands up, eye shut, before taking a deep breath. “What the fuck is going on in here on this day?” 

 

That pulled a small laugh from Kanda, who had both hands over his mouth to try and stop it from coming out. It only succeeded in making him sound like he was wheezing, though. “I think… we both have the same dream. Is it raining in yours?” He asked, seeing Lavi relax after his embarrassing little wheeze-laugh.

 

“Yeah, it is.” Lavi said, looking down at his hands before smiling back at Kanda. “You’re holding me in your arms, like cradling me, and then I wake up a little after that.” He added, slowly raising his gaze to the sky, watching the gray clouds as they slowly passed by.

 

“Mine too.” Kanda said, after a short moment of silence. “I’m holding you, and you’re… dying, I think. I don’t know why.” 

 

Silence fell on them for a while, neither looking at the other. The only thing that interrupted their content quiet was students filing out of their final classes, packing out of the campus. Lavi looked over to Kanda, seeing the man staring, absentmindedly, at the pavement below their feet. He looked up upon hearing Emilia calling out to him, smiling just a tad as he stood to welcome her warm embrace.

 

Lenalee hung back behind Emilia, chatting up Allen who was nodding with interest at whatever she was saying. Lavi felt himself chill a little in his veins, wondering why the world would bring Kanda into his life and make everyone else around him happy, except for Lavi. 

 

*

*

*

*

 

Lavi stepped through crunching leaves along the street, his headphones sitting snugly around his neck while he blasted his music. Sometimes, The Killers really couldn’t help with his mood. But, sadly, most of his phone consisted of just post-punk and garage-wave revival music.  _ Maybe I should get into metal,  _ Lavi thought to himself.  _ Yeah. Metal would be perfect for when I’m really in a bad mood. Is that why most metal-heads are usually so calm?  _ Lavi had an internal debate on whether listening to metal helped make someone less angry, or more angry, before he looked up and spotted a very familiar face jogging towards him.

 

Kanda. 

 

The man stopped once he was close enough to Lavi, panting softly and wiping a few droplets of sweat off his brow. His long, dark hair was up in a bun with a pretty purple bow around it, and he was somehow  _ sweating  _ in just a tank top and some stretchy leggings on this fine, autumn afternoon. 

 

“Heya, Kanda.” Lavi spoke, softly and shyly, with a small wave. He shoved his hands into his pockets, glancing down at his own pair of ripped jeans, before looking back up, seeing the other man still watching him with an expectant look in his eyes. “I feel like maybe we didn’t fully get to talk about everything regarding our… uh… dreams. Did you, like, maybe want to find out why we have them?” 

 

For a moment, Kanda seemed to mull the question over in his head, glancing away from Lavi before looking back up at him. “Yes. I want to know why we have those dreams, I want to know why I get such an emotional reaction from them, I want to know all of it.” He said, quickly, and Lavi was now starting to wonder if Kanda got nervous when near him.

 

“Then, wanna talk about it now? We can like, go to the library. I’m sure they’re got some weird soul-searching dream analysis books.” Lavi offered, as he began walking in the direction Kanda has just jogged from. “C’mon, I’m sure we’ll find  _ something _ there.”

 

Kanda glanced at his phone momentarily before he trailed after Lavi, falling in a steady pace beside him, stepping on the crunchy, dead leaves all along the sidewalk. “Do you have any idea about them?” He asked, looking expectantly at Lavi. 

 

“Well… okay, embarrassing story, but growing up I always thought I was dreaming about my soulmate.” A flush grew on both of their faces, before eye contact finally broke. “I used to think you were a girl, too, which is another thing that shocked me when we finally met.” 

 

“I used to think the same thing.” Kanda said. “Not you being a girl, I mean. I meant that I used to think you were, for lack of any better words, my soulmate too.” He shrugged, and some tension filled the air between them.

 

“Well, I hope you know that I’m not gonna try to convince you to leave Emilia. She’s a nice girl, real sweet and kind. You’re lucky to have her.” Lavi finally said, after a good ten minutes of silence. A soft grunt came from Kanda, and Lavi turned to see him smirking.

 

“As if I would leave her for someone I hardly know.” Kanda let out a half scoff, half chuckle, before looking back up to meet Lavi’s eye. “Some weird dream isn’t enough for me to leave my long-time girlfriend.”

 

“Good. I’d swoop in and steal her away if you did.” Lavi teased, but that only got a shove from the man beside him.

 

Somehow, Lavi thought, they might know each other a lot more than they think.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to follow me on tumblr at tigatrons.tumblr.com OR my writing blog souais.tumblr.com ! Kudos and comments are appreciated as well ❤


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